Support a Sex Worker and Rape Survivor’s Legal Battle

everythingbutharleyquinn:

rubyrevolting is an irl friend of mine and an amazing person. I would love to see her get the support of the interweb’s many generous people. Please REBLOG THIS LINK and donate what you can if you are able to. 

rubyrevolting:

Support a Sex Worker and Rape Survivor’s Legal Battle - please reblog and spread far and wide!

I’m Ruby - a sex worker of 7 years from Melbourne. I’ve been involved with Vixen as well as organising the inaugural Festival of Sex Work.

About 3 years ago I was raped by a serial ugly mug. Due to his history I decided to report it to the police. The committal hearing happened in 2012 and the trial commences in July and will go for a week and a half. I will be cross examined for 1 - 2 days.

Knowing how difficult it was for me to make it through the committal hearing and to recover afterwards, I have scheduled a month off work. This will allow me time to get through the trial itself and to take care of myself afterwards.

Emergency money that I had set aside was recently eaten up by having to move house in circumstances that were out of my hands. I decided to work very hard after moving house to get the money together. Unfortunately I have been struggling emotionally as the trial approaches (particularly since my rapist’s legal team applied to subpoena my therapist’s notes about me), making it too hard to work as much as I need to.

I do not want to get a loan if I can help it, as this whole process as well as the rape itself has already had a big impact on my life financially - not to mention the cost to my physical and emotional health. I also applied for interim financial assistance from the Victim’s of Crime Tribunal. They denied my application for very whorephobic reasons. By their logic, because I continue to do sex work they do not believe that the assault must have had much of an impact on my life, if at all. If I was sexually assaulted at an office job, no one would question it’s impact on my life if I decided to keep that job afterwards!

I’m usually not very good at asking for help and take great pride in being as self-sufficient, resourceful and independent as possible. But given the trying circumstances, I am calling on all the help that I need right now.

It will take a massive weight off my mind in the lead up to the trial if I know that my expenses will be covered during that period. At this stage I have enough money to cover my rent during that month off. But not for groceries, bills, petrol, medication and those basic day-to-day expenses. My weekly medical bills are high due to complex mental and physical health issues (I suffer from depression and fibromyalgia) - so it’s really important that I can continue to see my psychologist and physiotherapist regularly during this time, as well as my psychiatrist.

To take a month off I will need $3300 to cover these expenses. Any contribution you can make will mean the world to me, and help me in my fight to force someone with a history of violence against sex workers to be accountable for his actions.

If I happen to be lucky enough to exceed my target for this fundraising campaign, all additional donations will go to Melbourne’s Centre Against Sexual Assault - who have been an incredibly supportive organisation to me since the day I decided to report the assault.

Please click here to donate via GoFundMe

marginalutilite:

Eurasia.net: Turkey: Could Closure of State Run Brothels Endanger Workers’ Lives?

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A transgender sex worker gets dressed on a Saturday night in Istanbul’s Tarlabasi neighborhood. Many prostitutes work outside of state-run brothels, which are being shuttered by the government, forcing sex workers to turn to the streets, posing risks to their health and safety. (Photo: Jonathan Lewis)

The gradual closure of Turkey’s 52 state-run brothels is emerging as a controversial tactic in Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdoğan’s declared war on prostitution. While Erdoğan’s supporters denounce brothels as a form of “slavery,” sex workers fear the campaign poses risks to their health and safety.

Closing down state-run brothels “will not keep men from visiting prostitutes,” explained 48-year-old Istanbul sex worker Berna, “but it will push even more women into illegality and the back streets, where they will be without protection, and without any rights.”

Brothels have existed in Turkey since Ottoman times, and were tolerated by Ottoman rulers. During the first years of the Turkish Republic, state-run brothels were established as a way to control prostitution closely on all levels. Under the conservative Justice and Development Party (AKP), though, the emphasis appears to lie more on stamping out activity many Turks view as a moral outrage.

Several state-run brothels around the country reportedly already have been closed down – with official reasons including proximity to a new mosque and the nearby discovery of historical artifacts – and others should soon follow, said Şevval Kılıç, an activist from the Istanbul-based women’s rights organization Women’s Door.

Kılıç asserts that the closure of these brothels will only increase instances of violence against women and transgender people, many of whom for lack of gainful alternative employment work as sex workers.

According to the Turkish Ministry of Health, 3,000 licensed sex workers currently work in the state-run brothels, called “genel evler” or “general houses.” Women’s rights groups estimate that about 100,000 unlicensed sex workers, many of them in Istanbul, work the streets.

“In these houses, there is a minimum of protection, but on the street, working women are on their own,” Kılıç said. Upon entering a state-run brothel in Istanbul, men – women are not allowed to visit the closed-off, red-light district – have to hand over their cell phones, guns, knives and any objects that might be harmful to women.

The experiences of 55-year-old Zeynep, a transgender woman who has been a sex worker for over 30 years, illustrate the dangers. “I work on the street, on the side of motorways, in cars. It’s dangerous,” she said. “I have been attacked, beaten and raped numerous times. But what can you do?”

She added that she would much rather work in a state-run brothel, but that her applications have been denied repeatedly.

Kılıç thinks that the public attitude toward women and transgender people, as well as sex workers, has changed since the AKP came to power in 2002. “To the existing male domination, came an increasing conservatism. It’s a dangerous combination.”

The numbers seem to back her up: according to a 2012 report by the Turkish think-tank International Strategic Research Organization, one woman has died nearly every day in Turkey in recent years as a result of domestic violence. Government statistics report that murders of women increased by 1,400 percent between 2002 and 2009, with nearly 1,000 killed in 2009.

Estimated violence against transgender persons shows a similar trend toward increasing. According to Kılıç, citing data from LGBT groups, 45 transgender persons were likely murdered between 2008 and 2010, but 40 transgender individuals were killed in 2011 alone.

The government, as yet, has not monitored or reported on violence against sex workers or transgender people, she added. “It’s a taboo issue, and remains invisible.”

Government officials were not available for response.

Police harassment has become ever more visible over the past decade, commented Berna, a transgender woman who formerly worked in the state-run brothels in Istanbul’s famous Karaköy red light district. “They constantly pass new laws to force us into invisibility,” she said. “It happens that I eat lunch in a restaurant when the police come and fine me for ‘disturbing the public peace.’ It costs me 82 lira [$47.46] every time. I have to work more to be able to pay all my fines.”

Healthcare could prove a further cost if the state-run brothels close, Berna continued. “In the brothels, a doctor would come every week for obligatory health checks. It was safe. But without a license, it costs a lot of money to go and see a doctor for a check-up. Which girl can afford to pay 150 lira ($83.69) every week?”

Berna cited personal reasons as why she was forced to give up her much-coveted spot in a state-run brothel. Now it is impossible to return, she said. “You have to apply for a government license, but the AKP stopped granting licenses a few years ago. If they don’t close the brothels down, they will simply die out.”

In January, sex workers from the Karaköy brothels demonstrated against the danger of being pushed onto the streets. Their plight has won the sympathy of one of the security personnel monitoring the entrance to the district. “[I]t is hard to work in this milieu. It’s not easy for any woman, not good,” said the young man.

To date, the government has no answer; no work has been done on facilitating sex workers’ transition out of the state-run brothels. “If prostitution is a problem, they are not really trying to solve it,” said Kılıç. “All they do is to sweep dirt under the carpet.”

Two women working in the sex trade in Ireland have said that TDs “don’t understand how prostitution works now”.

The 29-year-old Romanian and an American citizen in her early 30s made the comments after giving testimony before a Dail committee for two hours last week.

“They do not really understand how prostitution works now. We explained that many sex workers come over to make some money and then move on. It is not like the majority don’t want to go on to do other things” said Rachel, originally from Romania, after the hearing.

“They heard from so many organisations against prostitution, perhaps because this is such a religious country. I hope more escorts contact the media and explain how this works and why so many girls come to Ireland. This business is not like it was 10 years ago when there were six or 10 hookers working in a brothel with a pimp. Nowadays it is much more different and there is not the coercion. You can be yourself, get a flat, mobile phone and SIM cards.

“We told them that we don’t want to have the law that would make our clients criminals. They are our clients; they are our income.”

She said the ‘Sweden’ model being proposed by a group of feminist, religious and other groups – 15 of which were heard at the committee’s sessions – had driven prostitutes back on to the streets and had made their lives more dangerous.

“Miss Smith”, the other woman who gave evidence on Wednesday, is from California and charges her clients “donations” of up to €1,500 for an “overnight” at a hotel. “It seemed to me they were relying on outdated information. They certainly did seem ill-informed,” she said.

Another woman in the trade, who has a post-graduate qualification from Oxford University and who speaks four languages, said she had been denied a chance to speak directly to the committee.

Meanwhile, the head of the Irish Countrywomen’s Association (ICA) has hit out at the firm which operates the prostitution website Escorts Ireland.

London-based E Designers, which runs the website, last week issued a statement criticising last year’s RTE’s Prime Time Investigates programme ‘Profiting from Prostitution’, saying it was not balanced. It is to send a complaint to the Broadcasting Authority of Ireland.

Yesterday, the president of the ICA, Liz Wall, said E Designers was using a loophole in the law, operating in the UK in order not to be prosecuted for promoting prostitution.

The ICA is one of a group of organisations campaigning to have new laws making it a criminal offence for men to pay women for sex.

everythingbutharleyquinn:

whoreseyeview:

patternofwords:

Unless you run into an opinion like “I feel that the attachment of monetary value to the baring of one’s body or engaging in sexual intercourse, male or female, damages the psychology of the individual, their self-worth, and well-being. Particularly in the case of sexual intercourse, which will release hormones that include ones which increase the sensation of bonding, the psychological after-effect can be harmful. I don’t think people should pay for sex, period, and that goes for men and women.”

The assumption with these posts being that people may not have objections to it regardless of the sex of the person for personal, philosophical, or religious reasons.

Essentially: blanket statements are bad and logically full of holes. The added heaping helping of arrogance doesn’t help, either. Stop it.

oh fuck off, you sanctimonious piece of shit. “arrogance”? oh yeah, being a fucking whore and having my life actually impacted by bullshit like yours leads me to be “arrogant” and speak authoritatively on my own experience and that of my coworkers, with whom I have fucktonnes of discussions about it. 

your “opinion” (which IS rooted absolutely in misogynistic attitudes and your “inclusion” of men has little to no objective value since this shit is ALWAYS put on the women involved in sex work and it is majority women who are impacted by it) is worthless since you haven’t had any actual sex work experience and are simply projecting your own values onto it. here’s a clue: some of us dirty whores are also religious! in fact, lots of us are! your religious or philosophical objections stated here as imperative deny acknowledging both our humanity and agency because implicitly behind it is that you believe we are devoid of our own personal convictions and values and these don’t factor into our choices and decisions surrounding our life. of course, you naturally did not even bother to consider the vast array of intersectional factors that are involved in sex work, but that’s hardly surprising considering your general incapacity to reason.

similarly bullshit “conclusions” could be drawn to a whole bunch of other forms of labour, including acting, modelling, art and almost any labour that involves one’s body and communicating intimate emotion and compulsion. YET NO ONE QUESTIONS THE FACT THESE PROFESSIONS ARE LABOUR.

And that’s the biggest issue and the point I was making, you peon: whatever your personal feelings about sex work, it is still work and it is work that is compulsively and consistently devalued and denied as labour to the DETRIMENT of the lives of the women and men involved in the industry. So-called religious and philosophical values (most of which are rooted in misogynistic belief, despite whether or not you have the faculties capable of recognising this, this shit does not come devoid of history and context, numbnuts) are used all the time to dismiss sex work as labour and the people in it as human beings deserving of labour rights. THIS IS BULLSHIT AND COMPLETELY FUCKED UP.

if you can’t see that? you’re a bigot. and a fucking idiot who spectacularly fails at logic.

I mean, the very fucking LEAST you could’ve done was actually recognised this was posted by a sex worker (I have more authority over this than you and the only arrogant one is here for thinking your outsider opinion is worth a damn or detached from a wider construct that harms sex workers lives) and had a look at my blog to get some more insight. but noooooooooooooooooooooooo protecting your bullshit pseudo-science was more important than compassion. get fucked.

also this crapola came from someone who states in their info that they like to post the “nude female form” on their blog… but I guess since they’re not paying for those images they’re not impacting those women’s self-esteem and well-being or something? And like, ignoring the fact there was a process in which many of those “nude female forms” (what delightfully dehumanising language, not like women are people or anything) were paid for that LABOUR of posing nude, because hey, this sanctimonious dipshit isn’t paying themselves so they’re totally innocent of that terrible corruption of self-worth.

I hate everyone except whores.

godforbids:

patternofwords:

Unless you run into an opinion like “I feel that the attachment of monetary value to the baring of one’s body or engaging in sexual intercourse, male or female, damages the psychology of the individual, their self-worth, and well-being. Particularly in the case of sexual intercourse, which will release hormones that include ones which increase the sensation of bonding, the psychological after-effect can be harmful. I don’t think people should pay for sex, period, and that goes for men and women.”

The assumption with these posts being that people may not have objections to it regardless of the sex of the person for personal, philosophical, or religious reasons.

Essentially: blanket statements are bad and logically full of holes. The added heaping helping of arrogance doesn’t help, either. Stop it.

Oh you precious ignorant douchenozzle snowflake. “I’m only a paternalistic bag of dicks because I care sooooo much about your wasted girly pancreatic excretions that SEX WORK IS NOT VALID WORK” has to be the most clueless thought put to words this century. Crawl back under your personal, philosophical, or religious fedora and keep shaming teenage girls you font of wisdom, you. And get the fuck out of this conversation, asked BY a sex worker to other workers.

whoreseyeview:

I don’t know if I CBF writing up the story of how I got spat on and pushed around by some kids last night. It involved a lot of really aggressive whorephobic language though and I’m not ashamed to say I threw a few punches. It was so awful. I had another really intense fight with a guy last weekend. Again for no reason other than their whorephobia they came at us. In both cases their more reserved friends just stood by and let it happen. Men picking on women, for no reason other than were hookers and they can’t stand seeing us. I know I should not push back against it so hard its not worth it and one of these days im just gonna get the shit kicked out of me but it’s so difficult to let them just walk away. ESP when they’re so aggressive and physical.

A dealer came and got me and his worker gf comforted me while I cried. I was so angry and frustrated. I hate they can get away with it.

I also saw a coworker called the scum of the earth by a woman walking past. For no reason, she was just standing there. I would’ve gone after her for it but I had a delayed reaction. I vented with the other worker though.

I was talking to a worker who’s been out since the nineties. It was a lot busier then on general and the abuse was even worse. All these suburban rich kids would drive past with cameras. The trans workers worked from a spot they saw them coming first and would shout out to warm everyone and they’d all turn around. Then when the cars got stopped at the traffic lights the trans women would smash out the rear lights with their stilettos and tell them to take that home to daddy.

I hate everyone except whores.

everythingbutharleyquinn:

I nearly died laughing reading this. IT’S SO FUCKING TRUE. I have always avoided this gross, toxic culture.

Lots of different guys like to screw hookers. They are from every walk of life, every income bracket, every race, creed or color. There’s no way to single out a group of men and say ” those guys dont/haven’t/never will bang a hot chick in exchange for cash” they all do it, have done it, will do it. You cant divide them into groups.. you can however sub categorize them. Now the common term for pay for play companionship for those in the subculture is… “the hobby”yep fucking hookers is now a hobby, yanno like building model cars or collecting stamps. The common term for a man who fucks hookers on the regular is a “hobbyist” yep hes just engaging in a little fun past time like building a ship in a bottle. Though i dont like either of those terms i use them because they have become the lingo of the culture and its just easier (hey I’m lazy) I however am no fan and have made it no secret that I’m no fan of … the hobbyist. Don’t get me wrong i love men who fuck hookers. Hey they keep me employed and put food on my table. I like to call those men, clients. A client is a man who screws hookers. A hobbyist is a man who not only screws hookers but delves so deeply in the culture of fucking hookers that they think it makes them special… that they fuck hookers.

Newsflash: hookers get paid to screw you, its not like its a hard thing to make happen. It sure as fuck doesn’t make you special because you have a spare 300-1500 bucks for a little pay to play nookie. Its like the guy who thinks because hes got 150 to spend on a limo to go out to the club that that some how makes him special and not a douche-bag. Really hes trying to impress other people with his means and that’s what hobbyists do, spend a shit load of time trying to impress others  that hes special because he fucks hookers, spends his days posting on message boards about fucking hookers, back channeling (normal people call this gossip and sabotage) about hookers and finally writing review, after review, after review about fucking hookers. Like who ever has the most reviews of fucking hookers gets into heaven first or something. It often looks obsessive.

She stroked my fur until i purred all over her

As a hooker with reviews i try to keep them to a manageable amount, i dont want every encounter detailed in all it’s hot sweaty glory for all the world to read. I want just enough so that potential clients know I’m legitimate, that i provide what i say i do and that I’m currently working. So when a client asks me if i would like them to write a review as they are walking out my hotel door, i usually just say “not unless you really want to”. Most of my clients are way too busy with lives outside of their hooker fucking pastime to sit down and detail how tight my pussy is anyways.

A hobbyist will always write a review. As I’ve said before its more fun if you get to brag about it after. Or if you get to slam a girl after you’ve paid to fuck her. Cuz really whats more fun then taking out your buyers remorse on someone who just sucked your cock and made you cum. Now there’s nothing wrong with being a steady reviewer but when you mix that with a constant hooker message board presence you get, “he hobbyist”. One who not only writes a review for everything but think hes an authority on all things hooker related. A hobbyist loves to tell hookers how to run their business as if someone who shells out cash for sex knows what its like to be on the other side of the fence. They dont, but they will tell you how to do everything from to market your business to how to suck a dick. Seriously they will. The will also pedal their “guidance”and curry favor, pass you around to their group of old dog friends, and work and work and work for that freebie they are all looking for. Ahhh to be the hobbyist flavor of the month, my skin is crawling just thinking about it.

A client, pays his fee, spends his time with you and then goes home to his life … because he HAS one.

Clients are the goal

Clients are what escorts want, they are low drama, they don’t demand discounted or free services because you are running 15 mins late, they call when they are going to be late. They don’t threaten you with their stature on a message board to get you to provide a service you don’t want to, They don’t stand you up after weeks of planning then blow it off because what are you gonna do complain and if you do that they will just hit the men’s only website and call you names and blah blah blah about you… Clients treat you well and are respectful of you and your time. Clients treat you like people they like, who are providing a service they want. Hobbyists are douchebags with limo mentality who more and more seem to not like women very much. It seems they are working out their mommy, wifey, or ex girlfriend  who fucked them over issues by screwing and trying to manipulate as many hookers as they can on message boards.

I was personally involved with a man who enjoyed fucking hookers for years. He was never a hobbyist, he was always a client to them. I would never date a hobbyist, yanno unless his hobby was golf or something.

everythingbutharleyquinn:

and this too.

Dear Tits and Sass Readers,

It has recently come to my attention that some of you *cough cough—male hobbyists—cough* think we are talking to you, and while on some days it’s kinda cute to watch you think you matter—to anyone, at all, ever— I just thought I’d take a minute here to set the record straight. If nothing else, the Tits and Sass editorial staff will now have a nice little post to link to the next time one of you forgets his place: silent, pondering, not commenting, and on my blocked list if you happen to forget.

Earlier today, one of our editors posted a call for submissions about how we feel about hobbyists. Adorably, a hobbyist thought that “we” included actual hobbyists. Because, you know. Men have no voice/power/platform/place or places to talk among themselves, so where else could they POSSIBLY talk about their entitlement if not on Tits and Sass?

Answer: Anywhere else you like, but never, ever here.

Presented for your consideration is the full, unabridged “submission” by said hobbyist, annotated with commentary.

A couple thoughts, since you asked:(We didn’t ask YOU though is the thing)

1.  When I am travelling to a new place for vacation, I like to go to tripadvisor.com and read about what other tourists liked.  I don’t necessarily have—or expect—the same experience as they did, but it helps set expectations.

Women are hotels. Wait, no. Women are tourist attractions. Wait. No. That sounds bad, too. Maybe it sounds bad because it is, in fact, a fucked up way of looking at women? You know what women are? People. Super weird, I know.

2.  Gadget reviews—cameras, phones, projectors, whatever—are similarly helpful.  And while reviews by pros are best, consumer reviews on amazon.com etc. can give you a pretty good sense of what kind of mind-numbingly confusing experience you can expect to have when you buy one of these things that you don’t know how to work.

WAIT I HAVE GOT IT THIS TIME! Women are gadgets. Also, women are toys to be consumed and rated. What an excellent argument in favor of reviews and hobby boards in general. The objectification angle is incredibly incisive, as women have never before been looked at as objects, and there are no ugly implications in such a crass oversimplification of the complexities of transactional sex. Unless you count things like rape and violence and the pressures that an “established reviewer” can put on a new escort to do whatever he wants her to do in order not to immediately ruin her own reputation. You know. Like a camera. You fucking moron.

3.  Similarly, reviews of Providers can be very helpful to those of us occasionalists who don’t know how to work them, but are game to try. Is she giggly? Seductive? Energetic? New? Not new?  It’s nice to know, and it’s only through review boards that anyone other than the most experienced Johns will know what someone may be like before they actually find out what she is like.

One good way to get a feel for who a sex worker is as a person is to read through her entire ad, website, and blog if she has one. It DOES require that you trust that a woman’s writing might give you a better idea of who she is as a whole person than you might get from the astute observations of the guy who has received and rated over one hundred blow jobs on TER, which is kiiiiind of a gamble. HOWEVER, it is entirely possible that if you grant her personhood in allowing her to demonstrate her own personality, you will not forget that she is actually not a camera during your time together! [You may or may not find this rewarding?]

4.  What’s bad?  Flamers suck, but you (and they) and oftentimes we know who they are.  Numbers sort of suck, but they tend to trend towards accuracy and I don’t really care if someone who sounds like lots of fun got a 6 or a 7 from some alias John I don’t know.

Flamers do suck. Trolls suck. They sure do. You know what sucks EVEN MORE? Guys who think that their two hundred bucks and gold star reputation should earn him the right to take advantage of new or young escorts with community impunity. The problem isn’t the obvious flamers. The problem is the insidious, benevolent predators. How do you rate the anonymous John’s likelihood to rape or coerce unsafe services on a scale of 1-10? Or do you consider sufficient the current ratings system, dealing exclusively with whether your tourist attraction is giggly or seductive?

Mugshot of TER founder Dave Elms, who paid to kill an escort he’d already outed. Classic “troll” behavior!

5.  What’s worse?  Not having the boards at all.  Then all you’ve got is Backpage and self-run sites and LE and fake posts and…

Self-run sites ARE pretty sketchy, what with their female-written copy and lack of star ratings. Be honest. It’s worse for you. It’s worse for ONLY you. The illusion that the boards are a mutually beneficial necessity is a myth propagated by men exclusively because it reinforces male power over the industry. Many women—particularly career sex workers—advertise exclusively through Eros, social media, blogging, and search engine traffic. If you had to develop an actual understanding of the literal human being person that you are booking for your next sexual encounter, rather than seeing her as an enthusiastic cock hotel rated seven stars on T-E-R-dot-com, you could probably manage to figure out whether she’s a good fit for you or whether she’s actually holding a badge. Just a thought.

6.  Trolls are everywhere.  They’re on Civil War sites, Ford Mustang sites, F. Scott Fitzgerald sites, you name it.  They’re worth suffering, because more info is always better than less, and God bless the www for it has set (some of) us free.

Trolls make the community less pleasant for hobbyists, like you. And hobbyists like you make the sex industry less pleasant for sex workers, like me. Don’t flatter yourself. We tolerate you, and we talk shit about you behind your back. The new girls may not understand how little power you truly have, but more and more girls are requesting “no reviews,” and it’s catching on. And, as a side note, as an “occasionalist” who needs reviews because he’ll never be anyone’s regular, your voice is essentially worthless from a business perspective. You’re a one-off. A gap filler. Not worth the investment. So why would any of us submit to your ratings system to make it easier for you to objectify us and see us once before racking up your next notch? We wouldn’t. And if you think I don’t value your business, you should just see how I feel about your voice. I don’t expect you’ve read this far, but perhaps a man will review it for you and put it in a couple numbers you could understand.

Cheers, A

Good chat. I think we understand each other now—B

everythingbutharleyquinn:

A sex worker experiences first hand the stigma of the trade after losing custody of 3 children when an abusive husband cries “Whore!”.

The inspiration for the film came from the eye opening experience of being a sex worker faced with a custody battle after having been a victim of domestic violence. It shocked me that a twice arrested wife beater could turn the tables on his victim by making allegations of prostitution.

No longer was he a wife beater in the courts eyes, it seemed that they had unofficially dropped the charges from “wife beater” to “whore beater” and that apparently wasn’t nearly as bad. Social workers, Guardian ad Litem’s and even attorneys took their turns throwing obstacles and delays in my direction to delay my progress through their system and provide an advantage to my husband, who immediately plead guilty and signed a case plan to voluntarily cooperate with the removal of the children into state care. I on the other hand plead not guilty to any misconduct warranting that the children be removed from my custody. I was not the abuser, and had never abused or neglected the children. This I was told made me the “hostile parent”. During my four year battle for custody I found very little support for Sex Workers in Custody disputes. In fact, I found little or no reference to any sex work related custody cases at all!

I think that the discrimination that I faced within the family court system is more prevalent than we are aware of. My project is to create a documentary film about my particular case and the battle that I wage against the Family Court interviewing key organizations such as the Guardian ad Litems office to understand their views and opinions regarding sex worker parents and their right to raise their children. It is important to recognize that it is not only Sex Worker rights at play here, but also the rights of the children of Sex Workers to have access to their Sex Worker parent in the absence of abuse or neglect. The fact that the family court has the ability to make custody decisions based on a parents involvement in the sex industry is astounding and should not be allowed. In most cases these children are not even aware of the parents involvement, all they know is that abruptly one day they are with their parent, and without warning they rarely see that parent again.

The emotional trauma of the loss of the parent far outweighs any effect of the parents occupation on the child. In my case, the children were unaware and home with their father when I left the home to go to work at night. It is critical that we begin to understand what is happening to these children. We must question a court that’s stated purpose is to protect the children, when clearly that is not the the goal when a judge can ignore complaints and descriptions of emotional abuse and neglect in their current placement with a father that has a history of Domestic Violence simply because a sex worker parent “posed no real option”. I questioned how a court could rule in such a way.

It was on my mind as I was watching television and saw several references to prostitutes on that reinforce negative stereotypes of trashy streetwalkers, drug addicts, and references to the fact that all prostitutes are worthless. This I believe to be an important factor in the attitude of the family court. Sex Workers are one of the last social groups that is still okay to depict with such intolerance. We should be offended, and demand sensitivity. It is the equivalent of “Fried Chicken, Watermelon, and a Hollywood Black Face movie”.

African Americans fought hard to be seen as human beings that deserve equality and sensitivity. Sex Workers need to stand up and demand the same.

this is real and this happens to real women.

I cannot endorse the comparisons drawn between whorephobia and racism as I don’t think that is appropriate, but it remains very true that sex working mothers are usually in sex work to provide for their children, yet by virtue of their job they are deemed unfit parents and have to face the constant threat of having their children taken away.

and just look to the popular trope of “serial killer/misogynist abusive pig is that way because his mother is a whore” in fiction for what people believe sex working mums are like as parents.

everythingbutharleyquinn:

while I was scrubbing the dirt from the grout, my brain was fiddling with thoughts and I got to thinking about how anti-sex work feminists loooove to pick on and mock the sex workers who get on the internet and talk about how sex work empowers them.

I think we all know I’m not that big on the empowerment rhetoric as I think it’s a simplistic approach and pretty much besides the point compared to human and labour rights but I was pulling this over in my head, familiar anger bubbling hotter and hotter inside me as I thought over certain conversations the tumblr feminist circle jerk had partaken in engaging in such mockery and ridicule and the sheet petty, vindictive MEANNESS of it all hit home so hard it made me breathless.

Cos, of course, these antis - on the outside of our work, our lives, our issues & beyond their understanding (no matter how many times they flog their dead relatives’ stories) - pretty clearly consider us as static, stagnant beings, always at one place in our lives, in one position, one perspective - well, we are just stupid little fuckholes, right?

Bcos I was thinking of sex workers whose first experience with activism of any sort was through the sex workers rights movement, whose first sense of pride came through that movement, whose first sense that they actually deserve rights like any other human was through connecting to that movement and the first time they found a community they didn’t have to hide from was being surrounded by other sex workers and those who shared a common goal. Many of these sex workers who turned to sex work out of necessity, as teens or young single parents, as uneducated women, as immigrant women, as trans women… disenfranchised, marginalised and facing more stigma along multiple axis than they could ever deal with and not having either a language or framework to really speak to it from and then getting connected with a sex worker community.

Is it really THAT hard then to understand why connecting with the idea of being empowered through sex work is an appealing one? When up until that point the only things you have ever known or felt about the work you do are disgust, shame & isolation? Is it really that hard to comprehend that for many people in sex work that the empowerment rhetoric can be a way of deconstructing socially-groomed and enforced stigma and pushing back against it, of being able to identify the good things that sex work has brought into one’s life (often the income, a life-changer for many)?

and, furthermore, just the first stepping stone into more? that most of the time our politics and ideologies evolve as we learn more and grow ourselves. Just like anyone else we are neither static nor stagnant. Our perceptions and ideas about our experiences can and do change. Our political convictions become more complex. It’s a process. It’s a process for everyone, for everyone of any marginalised group who has wanted to dig their way out from under the shit dumped all over them. Are we not able to even allow people to have that process without making them goddamn punchlines?

I can tell you, that process has happened to me and it’s happened to others.

But if you get off on mocking and ridiculing women who are already pushed out so far to the margins, then whatever, I guess you’re just a better feminist than everyone because you always Knew Better and never had to learn anything along the way. Right?

everythingbutharleyquinn:

Guess how sick I am of male sex workers pretending they are also the targets of the oppressive attitudes radfems impose on trans and cis women.

Also Ann Tagonist is vile but wtf does her sexuality have to do with anything???

During the fever pitch of the 1970s sexual revolution, Margo St. James, the flamboyant matriarch of the national prostitutes’-rights movement, burst out of San Francisco’s bohemian scene with an infectious enthusiasm for her cause: to make prostitution “palatable for the public.”

On Mother’s Day, 1973, St. James launched the San Francisco–based COYOTE (Call Off Your Old Tired Ethics), a “loose woman’s organization” dedicated to decriminalizing prostitution. Under St. James’s witty and charismatic leadership, COYOTE fast became a national darling. By 1977, the Atlantic Monthly declared that “no public relations expert could do more for prostitutes than Margo St. James has done with COYOTE.” Apostolic affiliates of COYOTE sprouted up around the country, including PONY (the Prostitutes Organization of New York), PUMA (the Prostitutes Union of Massachusetts), the Spread Eagles in Washington, DC, and DOLPHIN in Honolulu (Dump Obsolete Laws, Prove Hypocrisy Isn’t Necessary).  

At a time when women were making 57 cents to every man’s dollar, and there was a scarcity of career options within and beyond the menial pink-collar job market, St. James (who had worked a brief stint as a call girl) was determined to rebrand prostitution as a legitimate and necessary alternative for women. As she put it, “There is no immorality in prostitution: The immorality is the arrest of women as a class for a service that’s demanded of them by society.”

Though St. James managed to wrest endorsements from NOW and the League of Women Voters during COYOTE’s first year, she also made powerful enemies among the era’s radical feminists, most notably Andrea Dworkin, who argued that “rape and prostitution negate self-determination and choice for women.” Just as COYOTE inspired a generation of advocates for sex work, it also prompted a counter movement—what is now the contemporary anti-trafficking movement, which equates sex work with sex trafficking and aims to abolish both.

May 2013 marks the 40th anniversary of COYOTE, which in 1999 became the St. James Infirmary, a free, nonjudgmental occupational safety and health clinic in San Francisco run by and for sex workers of all genders and sexual orientations. Though the organization bears her name, St. James left the city after its founding. From her cabin on Orcas Island, off the coast of Washington state, with chickens clucking and a rooster crowing in the background, St. James, 75, still hosts regular visitors (“My neighbors probably think I’m turning tricks!”) to talk about the ongoing “War on Whores” and COYOTE, the first U.S. organization to fight back… [Read the interview!]

everythingbutharleyquinn:

audaciaray:

(via Online and offline sex worker rights are human rights | Association for Progressive Communications)

Pretty much the only time I sign internet petitions is when people who are working on the offline campaign believe that it will help them to be able to demonstrate online support. This petition, which supports the rights of cisgender women who are sex workers in several places in Africa, is one of those. Check it out, learn about the human rights abuses sex workers in Africa and currently facing, and sign!

(I just have to add this photo is from a protest I was at, lol… we’re in front of Parliament House)

everythingbutharleyquinn:

paranoidgynoid:

everythingbutharleyquinn:

Crying so hard over Ros.

Funny I was just about to post about this very subject!

As someone in the industry, I perhaps had a lot invested in an SW as a character, so I may be biased, but it still SUCKS that of all the fates available to her, she had the stock standard “whore as victim of a psychopath to show how EEEVIIILLLL he is” ending.Especially when it was so refreshing to see an SW who for once was a well-rounded character. 

I don’t think it’s bias. It’s fuckn disgusting that this is how they used her. Full stop. It is total bullshit, it’s whorephobic as hell and it just is another example of the disposable sex worker trope. It’s even more galling then that they took time to develop her as a character and as a likeable one. 

I guess the writers gave in to those sections of the GoT fandom screeching about how much they hate her, or that “SHE WAS NEVERRR IN THE BOOOOOKSSS!!11!”.

Look, I know this fandom’s misogyny is famed (like all fandoms I guess LOL) but WHY? Why do they hate her?? What possible motivation or reason?

Wait, wait… let me guess… there’s a whole bunch of pple who think Little Finger is totally hot and sexy and so HOW DARE that dirty hor betray him or something like that?

Fuck that, half of the people saying that shit have never even read them anyway. I read them years ago and I fuckin loved her, idgaf that she wasn’t in the goddamn books. Fandoms are obnoxious in general, particularly towards female characters who don’t fit their ideal of what kind of women should be depicted on screen. And writers in general aren’t known for treating SW characters with much respect, so really I’m not surprised, ugh.  

I’m surprised it came around this early. I guess I’m not too surprised another woman was shafted in a horrible way, especially a sex worker, but… I dunno, I had hopes for her I guess. And weirdly enough, by this show’s rules, she seemed too minor a character for the writers to bother torturing her. 

Me and other sex workers on twitter have been mourning. and horrified. so fucked.

Rebloggable by request:

renamok:

the-khaleesi-sucks-at-acting:

If you don’t get this, you’re an idiot and I don’t want to consort with you under any circumstances.