“I don’t believe rape is inevitable or natural. If I did, I would have no reason to be here. If I did, my political practice would be different than it is. Have you ever wondered why we [women] are not just in armed combat against you? It’s not because there’s a shortage of kitchen knives in this country. It is because we believe in your humanity, against all the evidence.” — Andrea Dworkin (via dreamofwhatcanbe)

So a Girl Walks into a Comedy Club....


Trigger warning: rape jokes, rape culture



This is something that happened to a friend of mine in her own words.

“So, on Friday night my friend and I were at her house and wanted to get out and do something for the evening. We brainstormed ideas and she brought up the idea of seeing a show at the Laugh Factory. I’d never been, I thought it sounded fun, so we went. We saw that Dane Cook, along some other names we didn’t recognize we’re playing, and while we both agree that Cook’s style is not really our taste we were opened-minded about what the others had to offer. And we figured even good ol’ Dane can be funny sometimes, even if it’s not really our thing. Anyhoo, his act was actually fine, but then when his was done, some other guy I didn’t recognize took the stage. Of course, I would find out later this was Daniel Tosh, but at the time I thought he was just some yahoo who somehow got a gig going on after Cook. I honestly thought he was an amateur because he didn’t seem that comfortable on stage and seemed to have a really awkward presence. 

So Tosh then starts making some very generalizing, declarative statements about rape jokes always being funny, how can a rape joke not be funny, rape is hilarious, etc. I don’t know why he was so repetitive about it but I felt provoked because I, for one, DON’T find them funny and never have. So I didnt appreciate Daniel Tosh (or anyone!) telling me I should find them funny. So I yelled out, “Actually, rape jokes are never funny!”

I did it because, even though being “disruptive” is against my nature, I felt that sitting there and saying nothing, or leaving quietly, would have been against my values as a person and as a woman. I don’t sit there while someone tells me how I should feel about something as profound and damaging as rape. 

After I called out to him, Tosh paused for a moment. Then, he says, “Wouldn’t it be funny if that girl got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her…” and I, completely stunned and finding it hard to process what was happening but knowing i needed to get out of there, immediately nudged my friend, who was also completely stunned, and we high-tailed it out of there. It was humiliating, of course, especially as the audience guffawed in response to Tosh, their eyes following us as we made our way out of there. I didn’t hear the rest of what he said about me.

Now in the lobby, I spoke with the girl at the will-call desk, and demanded to see the manager. The manager on duty quickly came out to speak with me, and she was profusely apologetic, and seemed genuinely sorry about what had happened, but of course we received no refund for our tickets, but instead a comped pair of tickets, although she admitted she understood if we never wanted to come back. I can imagine the Laugh Factory doesn’t really have a policy in place for what happens when a woman has to leave in a hurry because the person onstage is hurling violent words about sexual violence at her. Although maybe I’m not the first girl to have that happen to her. 

I should probably add that having to basically flee while Tosh was enthusing about how hilarious it would be if I was gang-raped in that small, claustrophic room was pretty viscerally terrifying and threatening all the same, even if the actual scenario was unlikely to take place. The suggestion of it is violent enough and was meant to put me in my place.”

Please reblog and spread the word.

So this literally made me feel sick. My stomach turned, I began to feel uneasy, and even now I feel like I am just on the edge of nausea. This man is vile and repulsive and so is every other shithead in that entire club that went along with it and laughed at the joke. 

In b4 a bunch of fuckheads try to defend Tosh by saying he was just dealing with a heckler and women should stop asking for “special treatment” (and by “special treatment” I mean “not wanting to be threatened with gang-rape”).

This is very important


If you reblog a post with really graphic violence, abuse, descriptions of said abuse/violence (this especially includes sexual violence) YOU NEED TO TAG IT AND ADD A TRIGGER WARNING.

And you need to make sure the warning goes BEFORE any really graphic images.  Preferably, if you MUST add really graphic images use the “insert/edit image” option to link to one, not “Upload Photo,” that way you have to click it to see it.

“Shocking” people into sympathy may seem like a great scare tactic to get people to care about your issue, but it’s very traumatizing to the victims of the crimes you are trying to spread awareness about.  If you really care about victims, do not rub this shit in their faces by posting really graphic images/descriptions where they can stumble across it unprepared.

This is the same tactic anti-choicers use to freak people out.  Don’t be like that.  Post a warning so people who are triggered by this stuff can avoid it. Tags also help for people who use Tumblr Savior to block certain keywords on their dash.

Here’s a trigger warning FAQ. It’s not hard.